An Ode to Porkins (and Star Wars Merchandise) By David Shimomura • April 23rd, 2018 Not only does Porkins merch exist, but there’s a lot of it. What’s that say about Star Wars?
Letter from the Editor Unwinnable Monthly – April 2018 By Stu Horvath • April 16th, 2018 The April issue of Unwinnable Monthly is out now! Get the grand tour here!
Exploits Feature On Canon By Gavin Craig • April 2nd, 2018 If we must have canons, let’s build our own and blow them up every now and then.
Tomb Raider is a Wonderful Game (and a Terrible Movie) By Gingy Gibson • March 30th, 2018 Movie adaptations of video games are nigh on impossible to get right. Tomb Raider is no exception.
Mute: Sci-Fi is a Genre, Not a Setting By David Shimomura • March 26th, 2018 The story of a man searching for his lost love in a city hostile to him is novel. But its not necessary to tell this story in the future and Jones does nothing to connect the futurey, robotic set dressings with the actual story.
Feature Don’t Go In the Woods By Stu Horvath • March 23rd, 2018 Stu Horvath discusses the new horror film They Remain with director Philip Gelatt and author Laird Barron, who penned the story from which the film was adapted.
The Astonishing Banality of Cinematography in The Outsider By David Shimomura • March 12th, 2018 Even as Leto becomes immersed in this world, falls in love, and treats himself to bath time with his bros, the camerawork and direction reinforces how inappropriate the whole venture is.
The Ritual Fails to Close the Circle By David Shimomura • March 6th, 2018 You can probably turn The Ritual off at the 66-minute mark.
Cloverfield and the Art of the Cinematic Universe By David Shimomura • February 19th, 2018 The Cloverfield Paradox is a bad film with very good marketing.
Who is Your Favorite Superhero? By P.J. Kryfko • February 15th, 2018 I’d answer, too excitedly, “Black Panther!”
Documentary Sunday That Sugar Film By Megan Condis • February 14th, 2018 Can a documentary be considered brain food?
The Space of Water By David Shimomura • February 5th, 2018 All together the spaces in The Shape of Water feel not just believable but contribute Michael-Stuhlbarg-levels-of-performance.
Jigsaw’s Twist is a Celebration of a Returning Franchise By Bryan Mangan • January 8th, 2018 Suspension of disbelief aside, Jigsaw’s twist and the way it uses ideas from the twists and turns of the other Saw movies makes it feel like a celebration of the returning franchise. It felt like a genuine Saw movie.
The 10 Worst Movies of 2017 By Amanda Hudgins • December 28th, 2017 Every year has bad movies. This year, Amanda Hudgins will try to list 10 of them.
Best of 2017 The Best Movies of 2017 By Team Unwinnable • December 27th, 2017 Here are ten movies that, for whatever reason, the writers at Unwinnable found to be their favorites. In ten years we may not remember them as fondly, but for today at least they are the best.
List-O-Mania – December 2017 By Team Unwinnable • December 26th, 2017 All the stuff that filled Team Unwinnable’s free time this month – now with TV and Movie categories!
Three Billboards and the Farce of American Society By Levi Rubeck • December 12th, 2017 Her sushi-knife-sharp rebuttal to moral authority was exactly what I wanted and, upon receipt, I was sure her victory could not last.
The Heavy Pour More Like RAD-narok By Sara Clemens • November 30th, 2017 Thor Ragnarok taps the best kind of nostalgia – for a time and place, rather than for a piece of merchandise.
Documentary Sunday The Real World Series By Megan Condis • November 21st, 2017 Esports are on the rise, but we still need to figure out how to talk about them.
Lady Bird is Good, OK By Amanda Hudgins • November 20th, 2017 Lady Bird is the first movie I’ve seen in a long while that I was happy to have watched.
Letter from the Editor Unwinnable Monthly – November 2017 By Stu Horvath • November 15th, 2017 Our November issue hits the virtual newsstand and Stu’s got the the rundown of what’s inside.
What Happens Now Will Drive You Mad By Orrin Grey • November 15th, 2017 A running theme throughout Blade of the Immortal is the question of what, if anything, differentiates the good guys from the bad ones.
The Burnt Offering A Miscellany By Stu Horvath • November 7th, 2017 This month’s column is the equivalent of a clip show – horror movies, criticism of toxic fandom, fretting about fatherhood and more inside!
Fascination On Who Saw Her Die? By Astrid Budgor • November 6th, 2017 As a director not bloodthirsty enough for the horror fans and not tasteful enough for the cinephiles, it only makes him ripe for endless rediscovery.
Documentary Sunday The Confession Tapes By Megan Condis • November 6th, 2017 Why would you confess to a crime you didn’t commit? Megan Condis watches The Confession Tapes to find out.
500 movies in a year By Amanda Hudgins • November 3rd, 2017 There are a few things no one actually wants to hear about: your dreams, your diet, and how many movies you’ve seen this year.
Blade Runner and the Violence of Humanity By Maddi Chilton • October 27th, 2017 Replicants bleed, stumble, hyperventilate, and wince. Pris and Roy kiss like grade-schoolers even as they mourn their friends and worry about the future…They’re frightened, and they don’t want to die.
Giallology On The Case of the Bloody Iris By Astrid Budgor • October 23rd, 2017 “Some maniacs pass themselves off as normal. It happens.”
Fascination On Death Walks On High Heels By Astrid Budgor • October 16th, 2017 “I can’t help it. It’s a vice.”
Documentary Sunday Beware the Slenderman By Megan Condis • October 10th, 2017 Megan Condis explores the chilling world of memes and Beware the Slenderman.
No Accounting for Taste No Accounting for Taste – The Right Wing Batman By Adam Boffa • October 5th, 2017 In Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight Rising, progressive politics gets dressed up in the costume of a terrorist super villain.
The Unspoken Glory of Tardiness By David Shimomura • September 25th, 2017 Coming to things late lets you take it at a pace all your own, a pace dictated by nothing more than how you feel on that day or in that week.
mother! is bullshit By Amanda Hudgins • September 18th, 2017 I say this because I understood Darren Aronofsky’s mother! and it was bullshit.
2017’s It Isn’t Scary, It’s Frightening By David Shimomura • September 11th, 2017 It’s strangest quality as a film is that it’s a horror movie that is simply not very scary. While the line between scary and not is porous, subjective, and obtuse, it’s up to a movie to either define its terms or define itself in relation to existing ones.
Documentary Sunday Nobody Speak By Megan Condis • August 31st, 2017 What ya gonna do when the forces aligned against the freedom of the press run wild on you? Let’s hope we don’t have to find out.
The Burnt Offering Nostalgia Bomb By Stu Horvath • August 18th, 2017 Nostalgia is the bottomless pit into which we willingly throw ourselves.
Fascination On A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin By Astrid Budgor • August 14th, 2017 “The truth comes to light in very odd colors.”
The Dark Tower and the Razor’s Edge of Mediocrity By David Shimomura • August 14th, 2017 The Dark Tower does something few other films are able to accomplish, it’s a perfectly “alright” film. It sits comfortably on the razor’s edge of mediocrity,