I Played It, Like, Twice… Well, We Warned You: Playing Horrified During a Pandemic By Orrin Grey • May 22nd, 2020 Everything about Horrified echoes the Universal films in ways that will make fans of the original monster franchises grin.
Why Do I Like Lighthouses So Much? By Barrett Muth • May 19th, 2020 Robert Eggers and Virginia Woolf shine the way to an answer.
Exploits Feature Godzilla is the Perfect Disaster Film for the COVID-19 Crisis By Bryn Gelbart • May 1st, 2020 “If we announce this too rashly the public will panic,” he says, “Our political life, economy and foreign relations will be plunged into chaos.”
In the Business of Adaptation By Amanda Hudgins • April 13th, 2020 A faithfulness to a format that is no longer consistent with the product that you’re making is worshiping at the ground of a false idol.
Self-Insert RPF By Amanda Hudgins • April 13th, 2020 Bring Real Person Fanfiction onto The Graham Norton Show, cowards.
No Accounting for Taste Movies Could Be More Boring By Adam Boffa • April 9th, 2020 The Star Wars sequel trilogy is too exciting to be interesting.
True Crime for Beginners By Amanda Hudgins • March 23rd, 2020 I’ve got a reputation. Let me put it to work for you. There’s a lot to true crime, and if you’re truly interested there’s some good stuff out there. ACAB, let’s watch some true crime!
No Faith Without Blood: The Passion of Darkly Noon (1995) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • March 20th, 2020 It’s barely a spoiler to say that this all ends, as it inevitably must, with a literally burning bed and a homicidally crazed Brendan Fraser, painted red and wearing a barbed wire shirt.
Exploits Feature The Male Gaze is What’s Wrong with CATS, Actually By Violet Adele Bloch • March 2nd, 2020 “Apparently, as he was making his latest film, Tom Hooper thought a lot about fucking these cats. But only the female ones.”
Dolittle Makes You Think About Rectal Surgery By Amanda Hudgins • February 24th, 2020 The most interesting thing about Dolittle is probably that I spent a half hour trying to find the right words to describe emptying a dragons colon of armor before settling on “transanal extraction.”
The Smell of the Rooms Terrifies Me – and Lures Me On: The House by the Cemetery on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • February 24th, 2020 If you don’t like horror movies, House by the Cemetery isn’t the flick that’s going to change your mind.
The Emancipation of Harley Quinn from Suicide Squad By Amanda Hudgins • February 17th, 2020 Birds of Prey is the equivalent of an exorcism of Suicide Squad, the bloated carcass of FYE excess that DC had pulled into a back alley to die.
A Review of the Three Descendants Movies That No One Asked For By Amanda Hudgins • February 10th, 2020 Maleficent’s daughter looks to camera and announces, through song of course, that she is “rotten to the core.”
The Tide Pulls at My Heart: Night Tide (1961) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • February 3rd, 2020 Dreamy, desolate and drunk on its particular place in both space and time, Night Tide is a film like no other.
Here Be Dragons: Reigo: King of the Sea Monsters (2005) By Orrin Grey • January 28th, 2020 Fans of people yelling, bad CGI, and characters repeating themselves – and one another – your proverbial ship has come in.
Feature Excerpt The New Age of Nollywood By Oluwatayo Adewole • January 28th, 2020 A new generation of Nigerian filmmakers is finally putting quality over quantity.
Color Out of Space is Purple By Amanda Hudgins • January 27th, 2020 It’s only been a few days since I watched Color Out of Space, under a week really, and it ran through me like a bad taste — unfortunate, short lived, and quickly forgotten.
We Drilled Too Deep: Underwater (2020) By Orrin Grey • January 13th, 2020 If Underwater is cosmic horror, it’s from the point of view of someone who gets swept up in the devastation but never really knows the greater implications.
Best of 2019 The Best Movies of 2019 By Team Unwinnable • December 30th, 2019 It’s 2019 baybe and we’ve got movies for you to see!
Feature Excerpt What Lies Beneath: Subtextual Storytelling Techniques in Videogames By Jeff Spoonhower • December 2nd, 2019 Jeff Spoonhower discusses how stories can be told during gameplay through the use of powerful subtextual audio-visual techniques.
A Very Special Human Being: Man of a Thousand Faces (1957) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • November 27th, 2019 Despite an elder James Cagney being miscast, latex masks and plenty of melodrama, the Lon Chaney biopic still has some of that old Hollywood magic.
Consumed in the Fire of His Own Making: Apprentice to Murder (1988) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • November 27th, 2019 “Apprentice to Murder isn’t an undiscovered classic…but it’s better than its two-and-a-half-star average on Letterboxd would suggest.”
Because Bigger is Better: RoboCop (1987) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • November 26th, 2019 “Our modern morass fits right in with the RoboCop…”
A Beautiful Pattern: Knives Out and What’s Wrong with America By Orrin Grey • November 25th, 2019 “The people who were hitting Rian Johnson with death threats on Twitter over making The Last Jedi “too political” are going to love this one, is what I’m saying.”
No Accounting for Tastes WaveRunner 2140 By Adam Boffa • November 13th, 2019 In New York 2140, neoliberalism still reigns supreme. But maybe even this dire prediction is too optimistic.
The Heavy Pour This Time It’s Personal By Sara Clemens • November 6th, 2019 Sara got to meet Pee-wee Herman at this year’s NYCC and only freaked out a little.
Exploits Feature No Laughing Matter By Violet Adele Bloch • November 1st, 2019 To me, Joker is like a theatrically released omen.
Episode 16: Joker By Sara Clemens and David Shimomura • October 23rd, 2019 On tap: Joker, Paul Reubens and a bad version of Phantom of the Opera.
I Want to Tell You a Curious Story: The Prey (1984) on Blu-ray By Orrin Grey • October 15th, 2019 Despite ample opportunity, The Prey is a slasher that features neither Bigfoot nor Smokey Bear as the villain.
No Accounting for Tastes Countdown to Extinction By Adam Boffa • October 14th, 2019 In Hayao Miyazaki’s grandest work, humans confront extinction.
Here's the Thing Rebooting Saturday Mornings with Netflix By Rob Rich • October 12th, 2019 It’s been decades since Rob has set aside time for Saturday morning cartoons, but Netflix has brought that very specific brand of nostalgia back with a number of unexpectedly clever reboots.
2019 Spooptacular Horror Movie Recommendations, Part Two By Team Unwinnable • October 11th, 2019 We have more horror movie recommendations for you! This time, rich people are on the menu.
The Heavy Pour You’ll Float Too By Sara Clemens • October 11th, 2019 Sara muses on the weirdly seductive quality of clowns. Exhibit A: Pennywise.
Let Black Boys Be Soft By Oluwatayo Adewole • October 8th, 2019 Being black and male in the Western world means a lot labels are grafted onto your personality every day.
2019 Spooptacular Horror Movie Recommendations, Part One By Team Unwinnable • October 4th, 2019 Unwinnable loves horror movies, so we’re picking some faves for you to check out this October.
Documentary Sunday Jiro Dreams of Sushi By Megan Condis • October 2nd, 2019 Megan shares one of her all-time favorite films for her final column entry.
Exploits Feature Skeletons in the Closet By Sara Clemens • October 1st, 2019 “There’s always a chance to win in horror; there’s always light on the horizon, however distant. We hang in; we keep fighting.”
Feature Excerpt Ghost in the Machine By Harry Mackin • September 24th, 2019 Both the psychological thriller Personal Shopper and Breath of the Wild explore what happens when we allow technology to shape us.
That’s a Recipe for Romance: The Norman J. Warren Collection By Orrin Grey • September 23rd, 2019 Non-existent budgets, full frontal nudity, cash-in plots and five cult movies that are more interesting than they have any right to be.
Letter From the Editor Unwinnable Monthly – September 2019 By Stu Horvath • September 16th, 2019 Welcome to the September issue of Unwinnable Monthly!
