Unwinnable

Rookie of the Year

Abducted in Plain Stupidity

By Matt Marrone • March 8th, 2020

And the award for worst parents of the century goes to . . .

The Usurper

Noteworthy Metal – February 2020

By Astrid Budgor • March 6th, 2020

New year, new metal.

Noteworthy Hip Hop

Noteworthy Hip Hop – February 2020

By Noah Springer • March 6th, 2020

This month’s column includes one of the more powerful albums Noah’s heard in a while.

Gingy's Corner

Magical Diary: Wolf Hall

By Gingy Gibson • March 6th, 2020

Let’s go back to school! Again. And again. And again!

Regardless of what’s kept a card-based metaphor of practicing law from hitting kitchen tables across the globe in the past, Rock Manor games are toiling under green lampshades to fill in the gaps, by preparing their upcoming modular card game Lawyer Up for Kickstarter.

Exploits Feature

The Male Gaze is What’s Wrong with CATS, Actually

By Violet Adele Bloch • March 2nd, 2020

“Apparently, as he was making his latest film, Tom Hooper thought a lot about fucking these cats. But only the female ones.”

Horror on the Orient Express

By Stu Horvath and John McGuire • March 2nd, 2020

Choo-choo! All aboard the Orient Express, where horrors beyond imagining await you!

four men playing musical instruments in silhouette.

Look For Me Under Your Bootsoles

By Jeremy Signor • February 26th, 2020

We all have things that are haunting us. What matters is how we move forward together.

Dolittle Makes You Think About Rectal Surgery

By Amanda Hudgins • February 24th, 2020

The most interesting thing about Dolittle is probably that I spent a half hour trying to find the right words to describe emptying a dragons colon of armor before settling on “transanal extraction.”

The Smell of the Rooms Terrifies Me – and Lures Me On: The House by the Cemetery on Blu-ray

By Orrin Grey • February 24th, 2020

If you don’t like horror movies, House by the Cemetery isn’t the flick that’s going to change your mind.

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