The following is the latest in a series of journal entries chronicling the author’s descent into next-gen gaming degeneracy and assorted geekery – from getting his first television in years to trying to figure out why the @$@$&@@ you need two goddamn directional pads just to walk down an effing hallway.
Previously on Unwinnable, Kevin got into a shopping cart crash, met a beautiful lady and the went to dinner. She really liked comparing Friends to the Bible…. Now, onto Part 2! (RED FLAG #6: Verbal diarrhea cannot be cured with Imodium… or Wine.) To be honest, I was really lost as to what she was talking about until she, thankfully, asked me a question: “So tell me about your family.” Excited to finally speak, I began: “Well, I have one brother–” Interrupting, Jennifer exclaimed, “–I have a brother! My parents love my brother. My sisters love my brother. My ex-boyfriends