It’s strangest quality as a film is that it’s a horror movie that is simply not very scary. While the line between scary and not is porous, subjective, and obtuse, it’s up to a movie to either define its terms or define itself in relation to existing ones.
“The horrors in Happiness accumulate slowly…”
“The fact that no one clear camera solution exists means that the horror genre serves as a playground for video game cinematography.”
Scores of neighborhood children circle an object on their bikes in the late afternoon sun, chanting as they pelt it with rocks and sticks. When they scatter and dart past you, their grins seem impossibly thin and wide. Were those extra teeth?
Never turn your back to the hole by the furnace.
Ash is still a doofus, still has a boomstick and a chainsaw hand, and there’s still enough blood to make Carrie blush. And it still rules.