Unwinnable Presents Stuffed On Santa

“Don’t Shoot Me Santa,” by The Killers

Every year, The Killers release a Christmas single that benefits the RED Foundation. Don’t Shoot Me Santa is from 2007 and kicks off a trilogy in which The Killers face off against a murderous Santa Claus who shoots all the bad kids. The band’s work is greatly influenced by their hometown, Las Vegas, as well as the surrounding Mojave desert, and its sense of cowboy vigilante justice permeates this song and video.

– Melissa King

“O Come All Ye Faithful,” by Bad Religion

The idea of Bad Religion, a punk band formed in protest of organized religion, spending hours in a recording studio to record songs revolving around a Christian holiday is a funny one. But they did it, and it’s fantastic. Obviously this is satire, but it’s also an homage to lead man Greg Graffin’s childhood in church choir. The whole album is ripe with Bad Religion’s signature musical stylings, such as harmony and energetic solos, and rarely leaves my car stereo during the month of December.

– Sam Desatoff

“Little Drummer Boy,” by August Burns Red

I’ve never really gotten into August Burns Red; the metalcore band is definitely technically proficient and, but their abrasively harsh, screamed vocals never sit well with me. This could very well be a symptom of metalcore music itself—honestly a much maligned genre if you ask me—but listening to their Christmas album was such a treat, precisely because most of their songs were instrumental.

I’m sorry that I’m not sorry.

And why a joy the album was! My pick was their cover of “Little Drummer Boy” because it was so tastefully done, and devoid of the dramatics (the overwrought screaming and redundant guitar chugging) so typical of the genre. Put on your favourite plaid shirt, grab a Santa hat and chug down a nice cool glass of beer—it’s time to head bang into the new year.

– Chan Khee Hoon

“Player’s Ball,” by Outkast

“Now I’m here to tell you there’s a better day
When the player’s ball is happening, all day ery’ day”

What if I told you that this part originally said the player’s ball is happening “on Christmas Day”?

The sleigh bells in the instrumental always stood out but I recently learned via NPR that the original release of Outkast’s “Player’s Ball” was a part of a Christmas compilation for the record label called LaFace Family Christmas. The album version of the song included strange edits and bits of silence and it turns out…they were Christmas themed. That Outkast was tasked with creating a Christmas song that ended up being an anti-Christmas look at life in Atlanta (“You thought I’d break my neck to help y’all Deck the Halls?” Andre raps) and became one of their biggest hits is simply another dope chapter in the legendary Hip Hop duo’s history.

– Charles Singletary